I recently wrote an article about decluttering that mentioned how letting go of possessions can be emotionally harder when those items hold decades of memories—photos from when your kids were young, your late spouse’s belongings, mementos from a life fully lived.
What a well-considered answer to a comment that could be construed as critical or provoking. My own personal take is that I do not mind what name people use to refer to seniors (or their choices of representational graphics lol!). Less time spent on labels and more time spent on being genuinely respectful of ALL people would serve humanity well. Call me what you will, just don’t call me late for supper or my seniors discount!
I appreciate your putting all this "senior" stuff into words and also questioning what is a good term! I remember in high school, I was excited to hear "senior". It meant I was on the cusp of bigger and better things...maturity, life decisions. Now, somehow, "senior" doesn't carry the same expectations. Maybe this is your chance to craft a new term for us! "Mature" is another word sometimes used. Actually I considered myself "mature" in my early 20's as I started a marriage and had babies. That doesn't work for me either.....but I refuse to be offended by being called "senior" or "mature"....just keep calling and including me! Ps...I am looking closely at 80...can't believe it!
I love this perspective—especially “just keep calling and including me.” That says it all.And you’re so right: words matter, but inclusion matters even more.
Look. We've all watched or experienced the horror of younger people having to clean out the homes of their deceased elders. If older people can't see the realistic and responsible need for frequent decluttering, they risk overwhelming their next-of-kin, which leads to understandable resentment. The philosophy behind Swedish Death Cleaning is deeply moral and loving to those we leave behind. It's not ageist for you to point out that older people especially need to declutter.
I agree with you about decluttering. But for me, this was about something bigger than decluttering—and this is exactly why I wanted to open this conversation about ageism.
"Senior" as a noun is a very American usage so it does grate for me because it's not a usage that happens here (UK) much. As an adjective — senior citizen, senior railcard for example — it's fine.
I worked in assisted living my whole career. It was always brought up at many meetings what we should "call" seniors. I'm 66. I've earned the senior title!
One of the things seniors need is comfort, community, direction and hope when facing the loss of their spouse. “Mourning Hope” is a video cast that will begin on February 25 at 10:30 AM PST.
You can find our more about it on my Substack account at
My grandma said she was always 18 inside. It was certainly true! She viciously beat me at Scrabble many times.
I guess I'd say to have fun with it. By the time we're in our 60s, we've been there, done that, and bought some interesting t-shirts along the way. Mine yesterday has a drawing of Lucy and it says, "I could be meaner." Today's is a capybara being chased by UFOs.
I’ve come to see decluttering not as erasing the past, but as making space for breath, for movement, for what come next. I explore that idea in my Webbie of Wonder writing through a positive aging lens: how we can honor our memories while still choosing lightness and room to grow. If you’re curious, I’d love to invite you to check out my Instagram reel on this topic: https://www.instagram.com/p/C3LJtlRL3D8/
I am definitely a 'senior', facing different challenges as I go through the different seasons of life. I still have much to contribute to society and to my family. I do acknowledge that I have needed, and do need, various needs of extra assistance now. I was too proud to ask and just stumbled on through life. Surgery illuminated my need for assistance....and I learned to let my pride go, and to be thankful for the help that I was getting.
Feeling ignored in our need is very difficult. Being too prideful to admit that we have challenges and need assistance is limiting and painful.
How about we learn to embrace the season of life, the changes in our abilities, and let go of pride!! Stubbornnes can get us through....but can also inhibit getting the help we need.
Some age gracefully with no apparent needs. Some face many mobility challenges. None should be ashamed!! This is life and we need each other.
This is so honest and powerful. Thank you for sharing it. You said it beautifully: accepting help isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom. We all have different needs in different seasons, and there should be no shame in that.
Thank you for being so open and honest in your writings, they have been very helpful. I am 66, my sisters are 77 and 75. Our parents recently passed, Dad was over 100, Mom was 96. They were as different as night and day, but loved and cared for one another for over 76 years. My mother was active till the last 13 years of her life, she got the shingles and just gave up after that. My Dad was a go-getter till 10 days before his death, chopping firewod, haying his cattle, and visiting with friends. We saw first hand how different the "senior" life can be...it is different for each person. If we look at everyone as an individual, it is harder to "group" them in any one category. My sisters and I are very active, in good health, and have full lives. We laugh when people are amazed at our age. Chalk it up to good genes and mostly clean living, but we have seen too many friends and loved ones "check out early" to be offended by longevity. Dad always said, "Age is just a number, you can be old at forty and young at eighty, it's a choice." I agree. Those who balk at embracing "senior" references need to remember...there are many who never got the privelege of "growing old." Keep up the great work Diane!
Thank you for sharing this—what a beautiful tribute to your parents and to living life fully at every age. I love your point that everyone’s journey is different, and that age alone never tells the whole story. “Age is just a number” really says it best.
Thank you, Diana! You sound like someone who would be one of my favorite friends—one I would like to meet for lunch and would be comfortable asking for a ride to dinner! As I approach my tenth decade, I still feel young on the inside but have seen the wisdom of acknowledging some changes on the outside!!
Thank you so much, Carole—this truly touched my heart. ❤️ It would be an honour to share lunch with you! What a beautiful way to say it: young on the inside, wise enough to honor the changes on the outside.
I’m 77, wear my silver hair proudly, and don’t mind being called senior. What I don’t like is being called elderly because I’ve reached a certain age, especially because I don’t look or act like it.
I also still feel as though I am in my thirties although I am eight-five. I am delighted to have lived this long and don't mind at all being called "old."
I am this body and this body IS old,
very old and very lucky to be alive.
What annoys me is being called "young lady", usually by a waiter or clerk pandering to my supposed vanity. I now confront people who do that, explaining that calling me "young lady" is disengenious and that I find it insulting.
LOL The idea of being the same age as "old people" is something that I am wrapping my head around at 65. Personally, I don't get bent out of shape over the term "Senior". You might call me an opportunist of sorts- if it's gonna get me a better price on some art supplies or some coveted freebie, sure, yeah, I'll play in the label word salad ROFL. I'm intimately familiar with the concept of intersectionality and I make it work to my best advantage. On the other hand, my hubby who just kissed 60 has proudly worn the "senior" badge since he turned 55 and would have gone "senior" sooner than that- go figure. I'm an artist and I am currently caught up in organizing and decluttering my home and studio, and have been downsizing by pitching the old and unused supplies and passing on that which is still usable and vital to someone's artistic practice-even if it is something that I have outgrown. I totally get the difference between a 10 year purge and some serious "getting rid of stuff" that I've had for 30 years! My interest has been in collecting kitsch and artifacts from a variety of world cultures and I've gathered some pretty cool stuff over time! I married late and we have a 20-year-old son who is an "old head" who not only enjoys my music but turns hubs and I on to some fun stuff, too. Maybe he'll want my junk when I'm gone, or it will go to a good home at an estate sale. I also teach teenagers- which is interesting. I've found that many don't know how to relate to me as I am quite digitally literate (more so than a lot of them, I'm discovering) and familiar with a lot of the trends and stuff that they are interested in. I speak to them as I would to anyone (minus any seasoned vernacular, of course). I'm just being me and I refuse to act "old" when that's simply not where my head is!
I am a member of the Texas Silver-Haired Legislator. We advocate for "older Texans" and work with our State legislature on their behalf. Here in Texas "Seniors" have been renamed "Older Texans". I am not sure that is any better, but it has caught on here and is in use. Barbara Aydlett
This is really helpful context—thank you, Barbara. I appreciate the work you’re doing, and I find the “Older Texans” shift interesting too. Even when terms aren’t perfect, these conversations help us move toward language that feels more respectful and human.
What a well-considered answer to a comment that could be construed as critical or provoking. My own personal take is that I do not mind what name people use to refer to seniors (or their choices of representational graphics lol!). Less time spent on labels and more time spent on being genuinely respectful of ALL people would serve humanity well. Call me what you will, just don’t call me late for supper or my seniors discount!
I love this take 😂 Less energy on labels, more on real respect—that’s exactly it.And yes, never mess with supper time or the senior discount!
I appreciate your putting all this "senior" stuff into words and also questioning what is a good term! I remember in high school, I was excited to hear "senior". It meant I was on the cusp of bigger and better things...maturity, life decisions. Now, somehow, "senior" doesn't carry the same expectations. Maybe this is your chance to craft a new term for us! "Mature" is another word sometimes used. Actually I considered myself "mature" in my early 20's as I started a marriage and had babies. That doesn't work for me either.....but I refuse to be offended by being called "senior" or "mature"....just keep calling and including me! Ps...I am looking closely at 80...can't believe it!
I love this perspective—especially “just keep calling and including me.” That says it all.And you’re so right: words matter, but inclusion matters even more.
Look. We've all watched or experienced the horror of younger people having to clean out the homes of their deceased elders. If older people can't see the realistic and responsible need for frequent decluttering, they risk overwhelming their next-of-kin, which leads to understandable resentment. The philosophy behind Swedish Death Cleaning is deeply moral and loving to those we leave behind. It's not ageist for you to point out that older people especially need to declutter.
I agree with you about decluttering. But for me, this was about something bigger than decluttering—and this is exactly why I wanted to open this conversation about ageism.
"Senior" as a noun is a very American usage so it does grate for me because it's not a usage that happens here (UK) much. As an adjective — senior citizen, senior railcard for example — it's fine.
I worked in assisted living my whole career. It was always brought up at many meetings what we should "call" seniors. I'm 66. I've earned the senior title!
Love this!
One of the things seniors need is comfort, community, direction and hope when facing the loss of their spouse. “Mourning Hope” is a video cast that will begin on February 25 at 10:30 AM PST.
You can find our more about it on my Substack account at
sandrasnavely.substack.com
The word “Senior” does not bother me. 🤓
❤️
My grandma said she was always 18 inside. It was certainly true! She viciously beat me at Scrabble many times.
I guess I'd say to have fun with it. By the time we're in our 60s, we've been there, done that, and bought some interesting t-shirts along the way. Mine yesterday has a drawing of Lucy and it says, "I could be meaner." Today's is a capybara being chased by UFOs.
Love this :)
I’ve come to see decluttering not as erasing the past, but as making space for breath, for movement, for what come next. I explore that idea in my Webbie of Wonder writing through a positive aging lens: how we can honor our memories while still choosing lightness and room to grow. If you’re curious, I’d love to invite you to check out my Instagram reel on this topic: https://www.instagram.com/p/C3LJtlRL3D8/
I am definitely a 'senior', facing different challenges as I go through the different seasons of life. I still have much to contribute to society and to my family. I do acknowledge that I have needed, and do need, various needs of extra assistance now. I was too proud to ask and just stumbled on through life. Surgery illuminated my need for assistance....and I learned to let my pride go, and to be thankful for the help that I was getting.
Feeling ignored in our need is very difficult. Being too prideful to admit that we have challenges and need assistance is limiting and painful.
How about we learn to embrace the season of life, the changes in our abilities, and let go of pride!! Stubbornnes can get us through....but can also inhibit getting the help we need.
Some age gracefully with no apparent needs. Some face many mobility challenges. None should be ashamed!! This is life and we need each other.
This is so honest and powerful. Thank you for sharing it. You said it beautifully: accepting help isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom. We all have different needs in different seasons, and there should be no shame in that.
Thank you for being so open and honest in your writings, they have been very helpful. I am 66, my sisters are 77 and 75. Our parents recently passed, Dad was over 100, Mom was 96. They were as different as night and day, but loved and cared for one another for over 76 years. My mother was active till the last 13 years of her life, she got the shingles and just gave up after that. My Dad was a go-getter till 10 days before his death, chopping firewod, haying his cattle, and visiting with friends. We saw first hand how different the "senior" life can be...it is different for each person. If we look at everyone as an individual, it is harder to "group" them in any one category. My sisters and I are very active, in good health, and have full lives. We laugh when people are amazed at our age. Chalk it up to good genes and mostly clean living, but we have seen too many friends and loved ones "check out early" to be offended by longevity. Dad always said, "Age is just a number, you can be old at forty and young at eighty, it's a choice." I agree. Those who balk at embracing "senior" references need to remember...there are many who never got the privelege of "growing old." Keep up the great work Diane!
Thank you for sharing this—what a beautiful tribute to your parents and to living life fully at every age. I love your point that everyone’s journey is different, and that age alone never tells the whole story. “Age is just a number” really says it best.
Thank you, Diana! You sound like someone who would be one of my favorite friends—one I would like to meet for lunch and would be comfortable asking for a ride to dinner! As I approach my tenth decade, I still feel young on the inside but have seen the wisdom of acknowledging some changes on the outside!!
Thank you so much, Carole—this truly touched my heart. ❤️ It would be an honour to share lunch with you! What a beautiful way to say it: young on the inside, wise enough to honor the changes on the outside.
I’m 77, wear my silver hair proudly, and don’t mind being called senior. What I don’t like is being called elderly because I’ve reached a certain age, especially because I don’t look or act like it.
Love this distinction between “senior” and “elderly”—and I agree 100%. Age is just a number; attitude and how you live matter way more.
I also still feel as though I am in my thirties although I am eight-five. I am delighted to have lived this long and don't mind at all being called "old."
I am this body and this body IS old,
very old and very lucky to be alive.
What annoys me is being called "young lady", usually by a waiter or clerk pandering to my supposed vanity. I now confront people who do that, explaining that calling me "young lady" is disengenious and that I find it insulting.
Sincerely,
S. Macapia
Or "Honey". Or "dear".
I agree — being called “young lady” sounds patronizing to me too. I’m glad you’re telling people this.
LOL The idea of being the same age as "old people" is something that I am wrapping my head around at 65. Personally, I don't get bent out of shape over the term "Senior". You might call me an opportunist of sorts- if it's gonna get me a better price on some art supplies or some coveted freebie, sure, yeah, I'll play in the label word salad ROFL. I'm intimately familiar with the concept of intersectionality and I make it work to my best advantage. On the other hand, my hubby who just kissed 60 has proudly worn the "senior" badge since he turned 55 and would have gone "senior" sooner than that- go figure. I'm an artist and I am currently caught up in organizing and decluttering my home and studio, and have been downsizing by pitching the old and unused supplies and passing on that which is still usable and vital to someone's artistic practice-even if it is something that I have outgrown. I totally get the difference between a 10 year purge and some serious "getting rid of stuff" that I've had for 30 years! My interest has been in collecting kitsch and artifacts from a variety of world cultures and I've gathered some pretty cool stuff over time! I married late and we have a 20-year-old son who is an "old head" who not only enjoys my music but turns hubs and I on to some fun stuff, too. Maybe he'll want my junk when I'm gone, or it will go to a good home at an estate sale. I also teach teenagers- which is interesting. I've found that many don't know how to relate to me as I am quite digitally literate (more so than a lot of them, I'm discovering) and familiar with a lot of the trends and stuff that they are interested in. I speak to them as I would to anyone (minus any seasoned vernacular, of course). I'm just being me and I refuse to act "old" when that's simply not where my head is!
Love this. You remind me of an illustration - the message was “it’s weird being the same age as old people” :)
I am a member of the Texas Silver-Haired Legislator. We advocate for "older Texans" and work with our State legislature on their behalf. Here in Texas "Seniors" have been renamed "Older Texans". I am not sure that is any better, but it has caught on here and is in use. Barbara Aydlett
This is really helpful context—thank you, Barbara. I appreciate the work you’re doing, and I find the “Older Texans” shift interesting too. Even when terms aren’t perfect, these conversations help us move toward language that feels more respectful and human.